You were gone for 7 years

My dearest loveliest cousin, I’ve haven’t seen you in 7 years since that tragic accident that took you away.

I wonder how’s afterlife for you. And also wonder if there’s actually any afterlife. If there isn’t, then where are you now?

Recently, I’ve dreamt of you a couple of times. And from the dreams I can see you’re happy wherever you are.

I’ve also thought about seeing you on the streets, but as someone else’s little girl. Probably that’s what people call reincarnation.

Everyone’s been fine. But I think the younger cousins have almost forgotten about you. They’ve probably forgotten how you look, how you talk, how you walk, how you laugh. It’s sad to not have you around for Christmas, new years and birthdays of your loved ones.

I turned 21 a few months ago. During my party, I have thought about you. I have thought about how the party would be different with you around. And also with you around, I might not have been so busy planning it alone.

Oh and did you know I have a dog now? You must be happy for me because I’ve been fussing about it since we were kids.

If you were still around, you’d be 20 this year. Probably a scholar in the local U.

You aren’t here anymore. But I’ll be thinking of you and missing you like always. =)

– – – – –

I visited Aasta on Sunday, with Aasta’s mother and brother and also my mum.

I realised there was a new ‘tenant’ right below my cousin’s. And I saw the name. A familiar name.

My other cousin, whom I’ve never met before, was moved near my cousin. I was only 3 when Faith was born so I had no memories of her at all. I didn’t even know I had another cousin until a few years ago my mum talked about her.

My aunt was pregnant with Faith. However, the doctor diagnosed the unborn with down-syndrome. My aunt was given the choice to abort Faith. But she chose to give birth to her instead of killing her.

She was born healthy and cute. But died 8 days later in my uncle’s arms. My uncle and aunt named her Faith because they both had kept the faith alive that she would be born a healthy girl. At least she was given a chance and brought into this world.

8 days old and brought back to heaven.

Anyway, while we were there, no one else was around. Agnes’ family weren’t there either. They probably chose to visit them both today itself.

I took a walk alone around, paying a visit to the other neighbours of my cousin. So quiet. So peaceful. So calm. Then I walked back and told my mum I shall book a place for myself there too for future use.


4 thoughts on “You were gone for 7 years

  1. hey… i was there when aasta went home…
    i was reading ur post and it kinda take a step back. well, we were very good friends in church. i miss her too.

    u know when she left us, i had dreams of her consecutively for days, i saw her playing guitar at somewhere really nice. i am so darn sure its heaven.

    i miss her too. ur blog just reminded me of my friend, my sis. God bless. left my email if u wanted to say anything…


  2. Hi KS, thanks for your comment. She must have left wonderful memories back then for you and your church.

    Well, I have dreamt about her too on several occasions and I have to say, I still miss her alot and wished none of those awful things happened. But, as the saying goes, life has to move on. As long as the memories are there, it wouldn’t hurt as much.

    Take care. 🙂


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