18 weeks young!

Caleb, my dear boy, has been a bit mischievous of late. Crankiness is his new best friend. Exhaustion is mine.

Recently turned 4 months young on Monday. Apart from the 4th-month growth spurt, he is also going through a leap (according to The Wonder Weeks) which will last for a while. Some days he latches non-stop, some days he doesn’t seem hungry at all.

Currently he’s still on a 2-hourly feed, if lucky, 3. At night, he’s still latching every 3 hourly and hasn’t slept through the night ever since his 2 nights of peace back when he was about 10 weeks young. I’m not too crazy about having him sttn since I know some mummies who are obsessed about achieving this as early as 2 months old. I’ll let Caleb be ready when he’s ready.

I’ve been depressed at the thought that my maternity leave has ended and I’ve extended using my annual leave, as well as unpaid leave. Mum’s gonna come babysit him in January as she’s retiring from her 30-year career as of today. Happy for her but she’s gonna take over a more difficult job after that haha.

So she’ll be here next Monday onwards on weekdays with me ‘supervising’ her and giving her on-the-job training for about a month before I return back to office in Feb after CNY. The thought of returning is dreadful. Like in full caps, DREADFUL! I foresee no potential in advancement and am only looking forward to being home with Caleb the whole time. He drives me insane but keeps me sane at the same time. Have I mentioned, motherhood is amazing? It really is. I cannot describe how much I loathe being away from Caleb. Talk about separation anxiety. Pretty sure Caleb will adapt to his grandma faster than me adapting to work once again.

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Even my priorities in shopping changed. I used to get obsessed over buying clothes for myself and a teeny weeny bit of stuff for our home. But now, it’s completely all for Caleb and just 1 or 2 pieces for me. Even Leland gets nothing from me haha!

I am, however, not obsessed like mummies who have daughters. Oh my! The way they shop can be scary. I wish for a daughter next but I don’t wish to go crazy over accessories and cutesy stuff for girls. Caleb is considered a low-maintenance baby (shopping wise!)

I would very much like to spam his photos here but I’m also afraid some people will steal them as use them as their own. But if you like, hop on to Caleb (and Casper)’s instagram account @casperandcaleb to view his growing journey.

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Ending off this post with a photo of our very important bonding moment through breastfeeding. BF hasn’t come easy for me as I was a low-supply mum initially. Milk boosters, massage, aromatherapy and whatnot. I’ve tried it all. Am still trying to find my milk booster without over-piling my body with unnatural nutrients.

Now I’m probably a just-nice supply. I hope to have more to pump and store for Caleb when I return to work. Got stressed up with so many aspects of BF that it took me a while to calm myself and accept my body as it is.

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Mummy will jiayou for you, Caleb!

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